Candy&Hun

Sunday, 21 June 2009

♥ 23:30

昨天晚上,我哭了.突然头脑有好多事好想问你.我不明白,真的很不明白. 我爱一个人可以为了他去改变我自己. 可是为什么你是那么的不同 ? 我为了怕伤害你,不想伤到你,能够把你的过错都不放在心上.你一次又一次的伤害我,可是我还是尽量的去忘记,尽量的不去想.我想了好多事.我问我自己,为何当出选择了你.那时,我和叶子的感情跟和你的感情一样好.为什么当我向他表白时,他却说他不能喜欢我?当时,他喜欢我,你喜欢我,我也喜欢你们俩.但就因为他拒绝了我,我便选择了你.对不起,这个我可以向您道歉.对于这件事,你也是知道的.你也说了没关系,你明白,你不见意.我听了也很高兴.后来的日子你也对我很好,尽量的让我开心.当时,我就真的好像是在幸福的天堂,每天可以和我最爱的男朋友发短讯,每天和我的男朋友聊天.

我们是经过多少风风雨雨才能在一起的,可是,却是那么容易的分开.朋友们都好羡慕我们的爱情.他们都好想知道我是怎样做到的,可以把我们的爱情维持到这样久而对你的爱也不会散去.我曾经以为我了解了你,我很努力的走进你那个孤独无乐的心里.我以为我成功了,结果,还不是一样?只是,我能让你说出一些你的心事罢了.算了,好过你总是闷在心里.

你到底是如何做到的?竟然可以骗了我一次又一次,伤了我一次又一次?还一次比一次深?你难到不心痛的吗?你是真的爱我吗?给我在多的努力我都无法骗你,因为,我知道骗你,你会伤心,你会难过和你会心痛.我不明白你为何可以骗的下去.一次两次就算了.可是,你骗了我两年!我想起,当你第一次给我照片时,我一直问你那个是不是你.问了你半年多都还是同一个问题.好,你说我不相信你,你生我的气.没关系,后来我就很少在问了.我要你的webcam,你总是给我同样的三个理由.
1) 我很累,要去睡了.
2) 我今天很难看,改天在看哪
3) 不要看webcam看真人比较好

我也逼问了你好久,每次都是同样的答案.好多次你也知道我是生气的,想尽了办法来哄我.我也是懒的再去问了.朋友们,家人,都告诉我说你是假的,照骗是假的,所以才不敢给我看.我知道有这个可能性,可是我还是选择了相信你.我相信你对我的爱,你是不可能骗我的.有人也告诉我说马来西亚的男人都很喜欢拿假照片去骗女孩的.我不信!因为我相信我的爱人不会骗我的.我能感觉到你对我的爱,可是..难道是我的错觉吗?我不想要一个不信任我的男朋友或老公.您曾经说过,我是你唯一可以信任的人,您确定吗?你明知道我是很想见你的,你知道我很信任你的.你黄浑礼可不是真的笨蛋.你是最了解我的,难到你不知道,当我知道了一切,我会很伤心,心会很痛吗?为什么?为什么要骗我呢?当初,我没逼你给我照片.如过是我逼你的,你怕给我看了真人的样子,我会不接受你,我没话说也不会怪你.可是,我有吗?我们那个时候都已经在一起半年多了,你也都很努力的让我爱上了你,还有什么是让我不能接受的呢?从以前到现在,我最担心的是你不能接受我,怕你不要我.我从来没去管你真正的样子.因为我知道,不管你,黄浑礼,长得什么样,我都会爱着你,接受你.顶多嘴上说说不接受,可是已经接受你了.老公..为什么??为什么要这样??咳..当我们在一起一年多时,我发现,我有个同学,和我差不多一样,有着网上的爱情.她也是很爱她的男朋友,男朋友也很爱她.可是,他们的audi没结婚(他们也有玩audi的),还有那个男的没有钱的,都要我的同学打给他.我的同学,为了他,去打工,赚钱买飞机票去看他.当时,我觉得我比她幸福多了.哈哈,结果如今,他们也以经见过最少两次面了.我好羡慕他们俩.

I recall tt whn I jealous of tt kissin pic,u try 2 sweet tok bk 2 me hopin I don’t tink 2 much. Whn eva I sae abt ani pic of wat u sent, u will ask me 2 shown u bk the pic. y didn’t I realize tt tt pic was nt u alrdy? Gt once, I saw the first pic in my blog tt guy is a Taiwanese model, u told me u cfm tt is u. Nw I also nt sure if tt pic is u. Bt whn I tell u tt y does tt model has a chop on the pic bt u don’t hv , u lyk so angry lyk tt, straight away tok 2 sahashu tt u also wanna create a chop . Aft tt all pic tt u send me will have chop.

Eg tt doggie doll. u told me tt tt doggie is ur sis giv u n onli left one. I told u tt I lyk tt doggie , u sae u will find another one send 2 me. n also, gt once, I review so mani pic tt u hv sent mi, I ask u y u gt so many different hp n u onli luff wae thru. Still gt, whenever I jealous of tt gal wif ‘u’ takin pic tgt, I will ask u 2 b wif her bt u tell me she is another model’s gf. Whneva I ask u again if the guy in pic is u, u will sae ‘u hv ask hw mani times liao?’haiz.we hv noe each other 4 2yr + goin 3 yr le.i reali don understand hw cum u cn lied to mi abt all tis.i tink u will rmb 1 sentence tt I sae b4.once u lied 2 mi,tts the end.i wun 4giv u.so whneva u lie,I act nth happen.bt tis time.reali cnt le.

if my sis nv found out the website,isit u still wanna continue lie 2 mi?i waited 4 u 4 so long.i waited 1 yr.u still wan mi w8 2 yr , 3 yr, 5 yr or 10 yr den u hapi? Tt time u ask mi if I wan u march cum or june cum.u sae if march cum,u cn acc mi till june den u go bk.i heard wad u sae,i was so hapi..bt,u nv even cum to acc mi.u noe tt hw much I wanted 2 c u.wanted to b wif u.my promises to u is true.bt hw cum ur 1 to mi is fake de?i eva wanna giv up becuz of the distance relationship.bt,hu is the 1 to support me,to encourage mi? is U , Ng Hun Lee.I believe u, I trust u,I trust everyword tt u sae and every promises u given mi.end up wad I get?! I don noe wad ting I do wrong make u hate mi?if u din hate mi,b wif mi hard meh?b wif mi nid lie to mi 1 meh?i tt fierce or I tt unreasonable ? i cn tel u nw tt,no matter hw u look like,no matter u rich or poor,I also will luv u n accept u as my stead.bt,u hv lied to mi.my hart pain till I don noe the feeling le.u hurt mi too mani times.bt I reali still nid u by my side.lostin u is like lostin everyting.i v sad n depressed.lost u le nvm ltr I still lost my dog too.i reali hate to b in tis world.gettin so much bullied. I treat ppl well bt end up I get back my deserved.is like,my past live I treat ppl v bad , tis live is to payback ppl.ppl tel mi tt I will b wif another guy marry another guy bt nt u.wo zhen de hen bu gan xin.i also don wan to marry other guy.in my hart, my husband will alwaes b u.onli Ng Hun Lee cn b my husband. I onli wan to b wif Ng Hun Lee.

Whn we first brk,wz get into my live.He protects mi to whneva I go.i feel the secure whn he is wif mi.although he is my fake dear bt sae frankly,I did take him as my real dear too.bt 4 him,I onli like him.i m reali luvin u deeply.he reali is gd.he treats mi eat,buy mi tings tt I like,whneva I bore he will ask mi out to acc mi to whneva I wan to shop.i reali likes him.if he would open his mouth ask mi to stead wif him,I will.although he don look nice bt he giv mi the secure.i wish to hv a bf lidat.acc mi to wadeva place I wan to go,acc mi watch movie,acc mi to zoo,tinkin of wad to eat,holdin hands tgt.I wan all tis frm u.I onli wan frm u.nt frm other guys.

U given mi so much promises,hw r u gonna fulfill all to mi? whneva my fone bills cum,u will sae u wan pay 4 mi,bt I nv c u gt the intention to bank money to my acc to pay my bills.like my mum sae,I hv wasted so mani money on the bills,I hv alrdy buy my perfume, new necklace,new ear rings,new anklets ,new clothings ,new bags with those money spend on bills. Sae real 1.i reali luv money a lot. Cuz I cn buy mani tings I like.I like shoppin too.bt I don mind spending those money on u. cuz I luv u. u sae u make a gold pendant onli we 2 hv de,I nv receive.u sae u will send mi tt purple shirt,u nv send.u sae u will cum sg mit mi, U ALSO NV DO. I waited u 2yrs.reali 2 yrs.hw I wish I could hate u! bt I reali cnt.y I so no use? U hurt mi once by once, lie to mi once by once bt I cn don care ,act nth happen de b wif u.i reali nid u by my side.i reali cnt live without u.bt..y?y u don trust mi?y u wan to lie to mi?suan le..i don wanna sae anymore le..i tink..tis shld b the end 4 us le.everytime I will go look at those pics tt u send mi.u send mi more den hundreds of pic.i hv also created 1 video of ‘ur’ pics.hw foolish m i?i also even edit myself wif another guy?! Haix..i onli cn sae..i trust u too much n luv u too deep..