Candy&Hun

Tuesday, 19 May 2009

~心里想说的话~ ♥ 01:50

Baby
Hmm..tis blog..jus wanna tel u wad is in my hart onli..u may read or close my blog if u wan..frm tt dae i mention brk to u till nw..i still luv u n nv giv u up..i try my best to giv up..bt i cmi..i couldnt find a strong reason 4 mi to giv u up..tt nite i cal u,u still same like tt time..givin mi a rude reply..nvm..i hv expected tt..whneva we brk or no contact,u seems to b like,change to another person..
y cnt i b like u?haix..B u noe ma?i reali wan to c u,wanna b wif u..i still hopin cn c u..u might still hv sumting hidin frm mi ba..bt nvm le..hahas..reali sha rite?i was wry tt u might ended up v ugly or nt gd lookin or nt rich..cuz..my expectation 4 a guy is handsome and rich..bt..i noe tt..no matter hw u look or r u rich..i will still luv u n wanna b wif u..i jus don wan other ppl luff at mi whn wadeva i sae,nv came true and all turn out to b opposite..2yrs le..our relationship reali gt to end up lidat ma??i reali don wan nw we ended le..den ltr a few mths ltr we bk tgt again..
i reali tired of cryin..tired of dreamin nonsense dreams..tired of wishin u r healthy..tired of hopin u could msg mi..i don noe y we r in luv bt ended up we becum lidat..sumtime reali wanna sae i hate u..bt i reali cnt sae..u hurt mi once by once..and the hurt is gettin deeper n deeper..whre i almost cnt breathe le..wad hv i do wrong in the past to luv sumone like u?becuz of u,i change myself.becuz of u,i hv make my close frens dislike mi..becuz of u,i argue wif everyone hu disagree u..becuz of u,i believe tt,no matter wad happen,u will b by my side..
all the while i hv been alone..bt i alwaes act tt u was by my side..cuz i m alwaes hopin u 1 dae could b by my side..makin my dreams cum true hard meh??in the past,to mi is hard..bt U are the 1 tellin mi tt u will proof to mi is nt hard..i trust u..believe wad u sae..and alwaes hopin dreams will cum true..
whneva i wanna giv up,u was the 1 supportin mi,wif mi to go thru all problems..no matter hw angry m i,becuz of u,i controlled down all my temper.wei le ni..wo zhen de shi gai bian hen duo..wo dao di shi na li zuo cuo?y u wan treat mi lidat?
actualli recently i down le..i sick le..tt dae call u,actualli is wanna tel u de..i bet to myself tt whn i ask u cal mi,u sure wun cal de..hahas..i win?! if u cal mi tt time,i will tel u in fone tt i sick n hw much i needed u by my side..i wanna let u noe i sick is cuz,i hv alwaes let u noe i m sick.tis time i nv tel u is cuz..i scare we will get in contact again.i don noe wad m i tinkin..i reali wanna to stay contact wif u..I M SAYIN REAL TT I WANNA TO B WIF U ..i reali don noe y i becum lidat..becum wan bt keep sayin don wan?
aft we seldom contact..i becum so lonely..i nv wan go out le..hv lock myself at hm or wrkin onli 4 abt 1 mth le..nv go ask frens go out..onli wanna stay at hm..watch tv..on9 awhile den go slp..even if on9 audi..also appear off9..mostly don wanna plae wif other ppl..trainin alone in rm..i scare i lost ahbei dey all..includin jie n dar..so..i try to go n plae or chat wif them..bt..mostly i stay awhile onli,if nt..nv on9..
alwaes dream of nonsense dreams tt wun happen in rl de..bt..i gt dream of 1 dream..tis is the onli dream tt make mi hapi..cuz..i dream of i givin birth in hospital..i giv birth a daughter..n i try to feel hu is my daughter's father..and i cn feel tt,it was u..i hv dream of being wif u..i hv dream of givin birth a daughter 4 u..i m hapi enuff le..although we cnt make tis dreams to cum true..bt at least..i hv tis dreams b4..i don noe if i cn reali get to b like junike..bt i will try my v best to slim down..
i reali nv go hospital chk up 4 my gastric..bt recently..i m sick..on n off de..will headache anitime..hmm bt v v seldom will fever..hahas..nvm le..tellin u all tis also no use..i shldnt hv step into ur world n u shldnt hv step into my world..frm the start we doesnt belongs to each other..bt wif our luv..we try to change the fate we try to change the impossible..bt end up..we din make it..hahas..laogong..sry..reali wanna cal u tt..laogong..r u hapi tt u noe mi or hv u regret tt u noe mi?hw hv u been doin neh?i tink u also nv met ppl like mi so foolish b4 rite?luvin u in everywae..even u lied to mi..i still nv blame or sae u..suan le..sayin al tis gt wad use?hahas..bt thx..typin all tis out make mi feels beta..
Laogong..i don care if u still care mi or still luv mi ma..bt i wanna sae..i m still luv u..my hart nv changes and reali nv angry u or wad..still missin u everydae..hai you yi ju hua yao shuo.wyyzanyg.till nw,laogong..i reali nv regret luvin u..thx 4 everyting..i luv u..4eva..wun change..ai ni yong yuan bu gai bian..

all tis out is nt wantin u to b wif mi or to continue our relationship..reali jus wanna type out wad is in my hart onli..even if u read finish le..jus pretend tt u nv read it jiu hao..although ppl all tel mi tt u wun cum sg to c mi..bt i gt a feelin u will secretly cum c..mayb is i tink too much ba?hahas..well..i m silly de ma..cfm will tink tis kind de nah..u cn secretly c mi..bt don let mi noe u r my guy..don let mi noe tt u r hun..cuz..i will surely hug tied u..n mayb will cry out..i alwaes act tt i m holdin ur hands..act tt u was beside mi..whn i was walkin alone..silly hor?hahas..mayb soon i reali nid take 15 mins walk to mental hos ba?soon de..i tink..hahas..lostin u is like lostin everyting..i feel so depress and sad..no one cn share all tis wif mi le..n i don wan mention all tis to ani of my frens..bt i hv try to cheer myself up le..alrdy 4get wad is sad n wad is depress le..i jus noe tt..i don hv a real hapi life le..i cn b hapi nw..bt..aft awhile..i like back to boreness?last time my happiness cn last v long..bt nw..it cnt animore..onli cn last a few sec..hahas..don nid to feel sry or wad..is nt ur fault..is myself no use..=)
if u r reali readin all til hre,thx 4 readin..i alwaes go view back all those msg tt u send mi..all those promises u given to mi..all those pics we hv taken in audi..all those memories..will alwaes b wif mi..hehe..don care mi nah..i sot sot de =) hope u cn continue study well in ur studies..all the best n tc alwaes..